On saying "no"

kayla king - land and sea

Sometimes it’s hard to know what is the right decision when you have the opportunity to do ALL. THE. THINGS. I think there is a lot of pressure to “be successful”, and to be honest, for me a lot of the pressure is self-imposed since I’m not working a traditional job right now.

I was invited to participate in SO many holiday markets this year and at first, the idea felt super exciting. I mean, I participated in SLOcally Made last year and it was AMAZING. I immediately started brainstorming product ideas and ways to differentiate myself and sell more products this year.

But the more I thought about it, the more stressful it began to seem. At first I thought the feeling might just be overwhelm and not wanting to do the work, but on closer inspection, I found something else. A glimmer of my heart was shining within the darkness of my ego, who desperately wanted to participate in order to prove something (to who? Maybe myself? Probably). In years past, I’ve snuffed out the light and marched onward, but this year, the spark was bright enough that I couldn’t ignore it. The spark was my family.

I knew that if I said “yes” to the markets, I would be saying “no” to my family. To limited time spent together. To mornings cuddled on the couch and evenings eating burritos in the back of the truck on the beach. If I said “yes” to the markets, I would be spending all my time making, marketing, or selling. And while there is a season for that, this wasn’t it.

A friend of mine shared something the other day that really spoke to my heart. She said something to the extent of: whatever you are doing RIGHT NOW is what your mission is. Your mission does not have to be a big, earth-shattering thing. If that means folding laundry and wiping boogers, kissing boo-boos and fixing dinner, then that is your mission. It’s the small things, the everyday things, that light the way and enable you to show love to those you care about in the day-to-day.

In the end, instead of feeling excited and full of energy at the thought of selling my work in public, I felt immediately drained. I knew it would put a strain on our family, that I would be working around the clock to get products ready, and that my most important role as a wife and mother would suffer for it.

And so I said no.

And as soon as I said it, I felt relieved. And I knew that I had made the right decision.

In the end, I chose my family. And as soon as I did, I felt GREAT.

Have you ever been in this position? Of wanting to do more and then feeling a huge relief after saying no? Share your story. I’d love to hear more (I know I’m not alone in this). :)

xo, Kayla

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